On Wednesday, April 22nd, around 11pm, my dad went home to be with the Lord.
Of all the ways to go, he was hit by a train at a crossing in Pewaukee. I was stunned when my brother Dan called me at 3:20am when the police & medical examiner came to his door.
Only 2 weeks until my daughter Hattie is due to be born. Why?!
Only four months after my mom's death, we've lost another parent. Still raw from December's loss, now my pop's gone. There are times the grief is overwhelming.
But...
God has proved Himself faithful throughout this maelstrom. I'm actually thinking of writing down the growing list of ways God has answered prayers, supplied for our needs, etc. during this difficult time. Even the way dad died fulfilled a wish of his...when the medical examiner says, "I don't know how to explain this, but...", it's another reminder that God's in the picture. Despite being hit by a TRAIN, he had no broken bones, no devastating internal injuries...the only physical cause of death found was his broken neck. His death was instantaneous. Dad's biggest fear, especially with his heart and other health problems, was that he would slowly, painfully pass away in a hospital. Wednesday night, he was here one second, gone the next. The God who intimately knew my father honored that wish.
I know there are those out there who either don't believe in God, or at the very most believe He's hanging around on a cloud somewhere, watching us make due on our own. That's not the God I know. I've seen His involvement throughout my life, financial provision, physical healing, guidance...to say that God's not around makes absolutely no sense to me.
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!
Oh, the picture...dad had it hanging in his office at church. When I asked him about it, he said it reminded him of me when I was little, how I'd run to him with my arms in the air. It also reminded him of the love of God, our Father, and how much He delights in His children.
I love you, dad!
I've been wondering why I've been feeling like this for some time now. Seems so out of place. I've been taking pictures since I was 12 years old. Most notably, I've photographed a hit TV show, shot a few weddings, portraits, and then some. I've derived great pleasure through photography over the years.
I don't take pictures anymore, at least not like I did.When did this change? I'm a photographer, after all. Then it hit me today...my mom's gone. Since she passed away, I've only taken 265 pictures. This is in stark contrast to the nearly 800 photos taken during the same time period last year. Why the difference?
My mom was my biggest fan. We shared a love for photography & we'd frequently share our
pictures with each other. Almost like a child's art hung on the refrigerator, I couldn't wait to show mom my latest "yes!" shot, or to email her the most recent Olivia picture for her computer desktop at work.
I've lost my biggest fan.
So, what am I going to do about this? Not take pictures anymore? To borrow from the cliche, I've got to get back on this particular horse & start photographing for myself again.
Mom wouldn't want it any other way.
I can't believe we're already starting the 3rd week of April. This year is flying by at an unbelievable pace. What's new?
(1) Baby Hattie is coming in less than three weeks! I'm really looking forward to holding my newest daughter (and Jen's ready for Hattie to stop doing chin ups from her ribcage.) With how much I love Olivia, my little Jelly Bean, I can't imagine loving her any less, or Hattie any more than the other. I wouldn't trade being a dad for anything. Olivia's my joy, and Hattie can only add to it!
(2) Busy springtime at Timber-lee. We're starting to see a marked increase in school groups. Plus, in a little more than a month, I'll be welcoming my summer team.
(3) I'm selling The Biner. Yup, I can't fit 2 child seats in the cab of my faithful steed, so it's nearing the time to say goodbye to my 2002 Ford Ranger. Know anyone who's in the market for a fuel efficient (24mpg hwy) pickup truck outfitted with red emergency lights & siren? Only 65k miles...anyone?
(4) I'm reading a fantastic book, "Let My People Go Surfing," a book written by Yvon Chouinard, the founder of Patagonia. It's really cool to glean from his experience as an outdoors enthusiast who started a business doing what he loves.
That's about all. I'm actually going to hit the sack early tonight. See ya next time!
On Wednesday, April 22nd, around 11pm, my dad went home to be with the Lord.
